Wednesday, December 31, 2008
Our 2008
Usha is having a great year at the different hospitals she works - gaining very satisfied and loyal patients who want to be seen only by her.
Chandra has been practising his ukulele more and more and can now sing while playing it. Datta too started on his own ukulele. They both attended soccer training sessions this summer and enjoyed them very much. They are looking forward to another session starting in Jan.
We all vacationed for a few days in Belgium enroute to India in Sept. We enjoyed very much, beating our expectations, given that we travelled with 2 toddlers and an infant. Thank God we didn't take a short trip to Paris, as planned earlier. The kids loved India and want to go back again soon.
This is also the year we voted for the first time in our lives - in an election of significance. And to vote for a winning candidate is a great feeling. We look forward to Obama's inspirationsl Presidency.
On the flip side for this year, we saw our 401(K) savings doing a vanishing act - and we are glad we don't speculate in the stock market. The Mumbai events during the Thanksgiving holiday in November left a sickening feeling, which will be very hard to forget for a long time to come. It reinforced us to be more watchful of our own lives and how we lead them.
To cap off 2008 on a positive note, we had great pleasure organizing a great party of friends and family on Dec 28th in Piscataway, NJ. Everybody we invited, barring 3 or 4 families, attended the party. With 70 adults and 35 kids present - everybody had a great time. Santosh Khammamkar's music program was well received. Kids' impromptu dancing to the songs and the songs sung by friends turned a good event into a great one.
Quite an eventful year indeed. And we are ever so grateful for another memorable year.
Looking forward to another great year coming up where we try to realize our long term dream of returning to India...
Swasti !!
Tuesday, December 30, 2008
Thanks for the Blast!
Venue: Party Hall behind Hi-Touch Wireless store in the Sukhsagar Restaurant strip mall.
Time: 11:30am - 3:00 pm (11:50am - 4:30 pm actual)
Scheduled Program: Cake cutting, Lunch, Music program by Sri Santosh Khammamkar
The party started on a very slow note as invitees started coming in around 11:45 and I was the only one from the host family receiving the guests and talking to them. But my conversation skills were not enough to keep them engaged. We needed Usha and the kids to bring charm to the gathering. Having only one vehicle, being used for getting things to the party hall from different places kept them and Haritha (my BiL Ravi's wife) stranded in the hotel. After a while, Ravi brought them to the party hall - past Noon and the party started coming to life.
My friends Satyasai and Lalita Kommaraju from Philly were the first to arrive, followed by Seshagiri and Rama from Edison. Then came my friend from Rutgers Satish Kethineni with his wife Srilakshmi and kids Sanjay and Sujay. While I was chatting with them, one of my maternal cousins Srinivas Kuchibhatla, whom I haven't met before, arrived with his family. And then a steady stream of friends and family started joining us. All in all, including us, we had 69 adults and 36 kids at the party.
It picked up tempo with enthusiastic participation from everyone present and by lunch time - with the menu that received good reviews - it really started to take off. Once the cake's cut the birthday party environment is in full swing and the kids had a good time jumping around and playing with the balloons (most of them were brought down and blasted by then).
Right after the lunch, just after 3:00 pm we started the music program. Our good friend Sriram Peyyety had his daughter Chy. Sreenidhi started the proceedings with a soulful rendition of a Lord Ganesha Bhajan (gajAnanayutam gaNESwaram). Sri Santosh Khammamkar started off his music program with a Kishore Kumar number and followed it up with numbers from Rafi and Mukesh, and mixed a few good telugu songs in between. Another good friend of ours Narasimham Kota had his daughter Chy. Sarvani dancing to the Bommarillu song - Apudo, ipudo, epudo kalagannane cheli. Sarvani showcased her talent with a smooth flowing dance to the song. His second daughter Chy. Manasa also danced to the Bham Bham BholE song sung by Santosh. Manasa is only 2 years old but danced very well and showed us all what's coming in the future. Narasimham garu himself showcased some cool steps in the process of encouraging his little daughter. Sriram garu started the dancing frenzy for the adults with his trademark steps and Narasimham garu joined followed by Ravi Nistala, my cousin's husband. Sriram garu pulled me as well to dance - and I obliged with my awkward-at-best steps.
We requested Smt. Sirisha Kotamraju (w/o Srinivas Kotamraju) to end the music program with her great rendition of 'nArAyaNatE namOnamO' song.
I need to mention here that all of this was made possible only with the gracious support provided by friends and family who covered several loose ends for us - before, during and after the event. And there were one too many of those, given that we were hosting the party about 180 miles away from home, in a different State. Bhargava made and brought yogurt for the party while also picking up the chapatis I ordered from a lady a little distance away from his home. Balu TKVL brought his mini-DVD camcorder to record the function. He also rushed to East Brunswick to pick up the Spinach balls curry, vadas and kaajaas from another lady I ordered them from. Seshagiri has been helping us right from the planning stages in booking the party hall and also picked up the main menu from another lady in Edison (Mango pappu, Brinjal allam/mirchi curry, sambar, Lemon rice, Dosakai pachchadi and papads). As we ran out of the pizzas for kids, he rushed out again to get another couple of them from the near by Pizza Hut.
Lalita, Padma (w/o Vikayakrishna TKVL) and Madhavi brought rice cookers while Susmitha (w/o Sundar) took charge of rice cooking. Santhi garu (oru distant relative and w/o Padmanabha Sastry - a family friend) and some other ladies at the party took charge of the food section - and making sure every body got everything they needed during the lunch. Santhi garu also helped in cutting the cake into pieces for all.
In the initial stages of party quietness, Sundar engaged the kids that were attending the party. And when we learnt that Santosh Khammamkar forgot bringing his Mixer, without which the music program cannot happen, Sundar went with Santosh to the near by Sam Ash to rent/buy a mixer. Having learnt that the equipment costs about $400+, we decided to go for a Karaoke machine from Walmart instead. And I requested Srinivas (Bhargava's BiL) to get it from the near by Walmart. He also took it upon himself to return it after the party :). Sankar and Vasantha took the boys with them to their house, so they can play with their son Mihir. That gave us the time to clean up the hall and return it in clean condition to the owners after the party. Sriram Nadimpalli helped with the video shooting while Satish helped engage the kids and took pictures of some nice occasions we missed.
Then there were others who helped us in other party logistics. All in all, almost everyone helped in making the party a grand success. The great part about it all is that everyone felt at home and took active part in the proceedings. Consider this: we had friends and family come from MA, NY, PA, VA, GA and of course NJ. Madhury and Ravi came to the party from a Boston suburb, with their 2 month old daughter Sri Lasya. Another dear friend Sriram Peyyety attended with his family having returned from India just the night before. Then there were Sundar and Susmitha who came from Reston, VA with their kids. My cousin Rani and her husband Ravi came with their 2 kids, from Falls Church, VA. We also had Sowmya and Prasad attending with their daughter, although they landed from Vegas just that morning - after taking a red eye flight.
My BiL Ravi and his wife Haritha have been of great help all along. They flew up from Columbus, GA for this party on Dec 25th itself, did a lot of planning, shopping, decorating and helped with many other logistics. We organized a few parties before - but all were close to our home, and none of this magnitude. Our heartfelt thanks to all that attended, participated and helped have a great time. We had a blast and we are already making plans for another party in 2009 :) We will see...
Swasti !!
Tuesday, December 23, 2008
It's the party that matters !!
As the day approached his excitement found no bounds and with just 2 days to go - he caught fever and started throwing up. After a day of fasting and taking only electrolytes, he improved only to do it all over again this morning. From the afternoon he got better - and we finally decided to take him to the day care to celebrate his birthday. So we all went - and his class was delighted to see him back.
He was accorded the royal treatment, given a custom birthday hat (made then and there) and everybody sang the birthday song. His eyes lit up like the brightest stars and he was filled with great joy. He 'blessed' the cupcakes and goody bags to be distributed - and everybody feasted on the Diego cupcakes. But he didn't eat much of it - other than taking a finger or two tastings of the cream on top. He would have nothing more. But he seemed full and content. All he cared for was being with friends, celebrating his birthday with them and his teachers and going through the party atmosphere - which he's been looking forward to for a long time.
I am sure he will tell stories of this day for a few days or even weeks. And I am glad he was in a decent shape to go to the daycare for this party. Kids are amazing - and always teach us how to savor the simple things of life. It's the party/togetherness that matters - not the cake!
Swasti !!
Sunday, December 21, 2008
Disney Ignorance
Both the boys enjoyed the show very much and surprisingly Mahalakshmi had a good time as well, until the last 15 minutes - watching all the characters troop onto the stage and perform their act. I must admit I didn't know half the characters. And some of the characters never showed up. I don't understand why Disney preserves the Mickey character so much - and doesn't make it spend much time on stage. May be they think that's one way of preserving and extending the magic of Mickey. I felt bad for the person donning that costume - he/she must have spent a ton of time getting ready - but all they spend on stage is under 5 minutes in the 80 minute show.
We got the first two seats in two consecutive rows - so Datta and I were sitting behind Usha and Chandra. Whenever I didn't recognize a character (which was one too many) I was asking Usha who it was, bending down and whispering in her ear. And my neighbour, a big man with a kid's enthusiasm - is annoyed that I didn't know nothing but still showed up. I guess I didn't do my homework well! Our trip to the Disney World last year did help raise my Disney knowledge though. The kids and their rhymes/stories books definitely help.
All in all, it was a decent show and I don't think I can sit through another viewing. Last month we went to the Wiggles show and we thoroughly enjoyed it. The kids are excited though - and they might drag me into the next year's as well. We'll see.
Swasti!!
Thursday, December 18, 2008
Corruption: Bigger than it sounds
For the past few days, as I stayed home to take care of my little daughter who can't go to day care due to fever and gagging reflux - I have been thinking of what to write next on my blog. With Dec 18th coming up, I didn't want anything else to take over the front page of my blog - so I left the previous article to stay on top. Of course, that thought also played into my natural state of inertia. Nevertheless, when I think of corruption in depth - it looked bigger than it sounds to me. We only talk of financial corruption, most of the time. And that's what we see (and think is) affecting people, directly. However when we think of cultural and moral corruption; and add thought corruption to it - the scale of impact grows beyond comprehension. Bribes, I think, are but an outward expression by some, of internal corruption in these forms.
The basic principle of life is to be happy. Towards this end, we try and do anything and everything we think will make and keep us happy. In the process, we are inflicting great misery on others and in turn on ourselves. Hence, we feel happy for a moment but we cannot keep that state of mind for long. We then go on perpetrating more of the same to gain those intermittent happy moments - and thus falling into the unending cycle of unhappiness. Well - there you go - I made it even more abstract :)
trikaraNa Sudhdhi - is the term used by our elders, when they ask us to think, say and act good. The three faculties here are: mind (thoughts), voice (words) and body (deeds). If all three are in unison and strive for the same, nothing is impossible - per the scriptures and our elders. That's how an uncorrupt mind and body is developed and sustained - which makes us happy and keeps us happy. If we think something but don't say it; if we say something but don't do it - then we are always in conflict with ourselves; and to mask the inner conflict we raise the curtains to the great drama of self-deception and run after the ever evading fruit of happiness. After all, the fruit is not outside but within - but we look for it everywhere else. What a futile attempt?!
I would like to delve deeper into this subject and address many of my own thoughts - but let me use this as a lead in to subsequent posts in the future (and spare you all for now :) ).
Here's my earnest appeal - to one and all (myself included, of course) on this Non-Corruption Day. Let's give this trikaraNa Sudhdhi concept a deep thought; contemplate on it and see how we can make some small changes to accommodate this great ideal in our lives. I am sure practising this will have a profound, transformational affect on us. This, I think, will be the greatest tribute to observing Non-Corruption in our lives.
Swasti !!
NOTE (on Dec 19th): When enquired about the news item/ad - I am told that UN already declared Dec 9th as International Anti-Corruption Day. Hence they were not able to run any item about Dec 18th. I should have checked about it online. I was a little embarassed when I was told of Dec 9th. However, I told myself that it's been a good effort - and although we were not able to do it on a scale we envisioned - we did learn some good lessons in the process. Thanks to all who supported the cause.
Wednesday, December 10, 2008
Dec 18th - Non-Corruption Day

As the day nears, and as we reach out to our firends, family and strangers as well - it's important to focus our efforts and reach as many as we can. When I talked to many, some of them joined readily, some were skeptical, and yet some others had questions. I will try to cover some of them here.
What is the Cause?
Non-Corruption. (Understand the evil effects of corruption and raise awareness among others at the same time exhorting them to observe a non-corrupt way of life - especially in politics and administration (as it impacts multitudes))
Why Dec 18th?
This idea of having a Non Corruption Day started about 10 days ago. At that time, Dec 18th looked like not too far off to lose sight of it; and not too close so we have time to reach out to many people. And it also happens to be a day to remember for the person (Vasantha) who came up with the idea.
What do I do for this?
Three simple things:
1) Take up the cause of Non-Corruption and reach out to as many as you can (enlist the support of atleast 5 others)
2) On 18th - make sure not to give or take bribes to get things done.
3) Discourage it and report it to appropriate authorities, if you come across any acts of corruption.
What's the goal?
- Reach out to as many people as we can;
- Raise awareness on the evil effects of Corruption;
- Educate them on what we can do as individuals to curb it
What happens in just one day of observance?
It's a good start. We intend to increase the awareness in the population by this focused effort. The intention is that people will take it forward to subsequent days, weeks and months as well.
What's the extent of Corruption in India?
India is ranked #89 among 160 nations surveyed, according to http://www.nationmaster.com/. It goes to show that we are in the bottom half of the equation. Sri Lanka is better placed than us at #81.
According to Transparency International, India scored about 3.5 out of 10 in 2007 (See image above). Again, nothing to write home about.
According to the ex-Chief Vigilance Commissioner Sri N. Vittal:
"Corruption is harmful in three different ways:
1) Corruption is anti-national.
2) Corruption is anti-poor. Rajiv Gandhi once observed that out of every rupee meant for the anti- poverty programmes only 15 paise reached the beneficiary. Out of the 85 paise may be 40 paise can be accounted for as administrative overheads. The leakage of the remaining 45 paise is definitely due to corruption. Corruption is, therefore, anti-poor.
3) Corruption is also anti-economic development."
[We know what role corruption would have played in playing out the Mumbai attacks, although it's premature to conclude about it while the investigation is still on. But we are not naive not to know where it went wrong and how corruption played a part at various levels of the food chain.]
Read more of what Sri Vittal has to say at http://www.hindustan.org/forum/showthread.php?t=2002
REMEMBER: Pass the word about Dec 18th - National Non-Corruption Day to as many people as you can, with the simple message: Don't give, encourage or take bribes - of any sort on that day.
Of course, not many of our friends might feel the effects of corruption or even this effort; but if we can touch atleast some people who have to pay to get their work done; who take to do others' work - if they can observe this day as Non-Corruption Day - and if even a tiny % of those folks feel the difference in their heart - the good feeling....the purpose would be met.
Corruption is an all-pervading evil that affects one and all in one way or the other and has reached a stage where it's crippling our society. We all want to do something about it - but don't do anything. So, this is our chance, to do that 'drop in the ocean' now and continue it - so when hundreds, thousands and millions come together, we might be able to influence the outcome.
Hopeful of a better tomorrow -
Swasti !!
Tuesday, December 09, 2008
Corruption - the common language
Add the scores of senators, members of the Congress and State Assemblies and others in public offices all across the country - and the list really grows big. Well one would say - the India CP (Corrupt Politicians) list would still dwarf the US CP list. That might be true. But still, for a country that's ranked in the top 20 non-corrupt nations - it's still a huge embarassment. For India, the length of the list is in line with its ranking (#89).
It is despicable what Rod B. tried to do - selling Obama's senate seat. It looks like two ends of the extreme - with Obama winning on the reform plank. It only goes to show that politicians across the globe speak the same language.
Don't Forget: Dec 18th is India's National Non-Corruption Day. Your part is simple: Don't give-in; Don't give-out; Don't even think about it - And keep reliving these thoughts every day thereafter. Please pass the word around.
Swasti !!
Saturday, December 06, 2008
Sun not here yet?
It reminded me of an incident from a few weeks ago, after we returned from our India trip. One night the boys woke me up - as they were going through jet-lag and couldn't sleep any further. It was just 3am but they wanted to get active and play. However, I was fast asleep....and wished they just went back to sleep.
Then they used their unfailing trick - "I need to go pee". If I don't take them to the bathroom - I know what could happen...so I dragged myself out of the bed and took them to the bathroom. Chandra was done but Datta was still on his potty - and chatting away as I sit in front of him, at a distance - for him to finish off - so I can put them to bed and I can doze off. All of a sudden, he made a comment that drove my sleep away and cracked me up in laughter.
Here it goes...
Datta: Why is it night all the time? I want to go downstairs and play.
Me: The Moon is still here. If you sleep for some more time, then the Moon will go away and the Sun will come up. Then it will be morning time and you can play.
Datta: I want it to be morning now. Why is Sun not here yet? I want to hit the Moon and kick the Sun.
What can I say to this kid?
Swasti !!
Thursday, December 04, 2008
Yoga without prayers?
On the appointed date, I went to the first class in November. As it's a weekday evening, by the time I helped Usha partly to get the kids settled and left for the temple- I had just about time to reach the class on the hour. On top of that, I didn't know where the old temple bldg. is - so I went into the current temple and went to the back of it - thinking that's where it's got to be. However, I ran into a temple Board meeting and was promptly given the directions to the old temple building.
It turns out that that the bldg. where the priests' quarters are located housed the temple earlier - before my time in Albany. So, in all this going around - I was a few minutes late to the initial class and by the time I went in - they were already going through the intros. I later learned that I missed the starting prayers only.
There were 2 whites (americans) and 3 Indians apart from me in the class. Apparently it was a smaller than usual class size. The instructor, an Indian guy in my age group, is seated in Vajrasana on the elevated platform. He seemed very calm and has a low voice. He walked us through how to sit in Vajrasana, explained the significance of Aum (Om) and started us off with a few chantings of the primordial sound. He then led us through the basics of pranayama and a few rhythmic breathings. After some more lecture and guiding us, we said the ending prayers - 90 minutes later - and dispersed.
I didn't find the two white americans in the second class. We had 3 more Indians joining the class instead. So, we went through the introductions, basics one more time - and then learnt about Shavasana for relaxation. The instructor asked us to lie down on the floor, dimmed the lights and walked us through focusing on various parts of the body so we can make sure there's no tension in those parts and they are relaxed. Truth be told, after the first couple of parts, either due to the dimmed lights or due to his very low voice - coupled with a strenuous day which included some brisk aerobics in the gym (yeah - I started going to the gym as well recently and more on that later) - I didn't know when I dozed off. The instructor was next to me when I woke up - and he was giving me instructions to wake up, rub my palms and put them on my eyes - as the lights are bright and since I was waking up from rest. I just acted as if I am getting up from my pose and felt a little embarassed for actually dozing off all of 6 minutes. Well - the purpose of the pose was served, I felt, albeit in some other way.
We then went through some breathing exercises and said our session ending prayers and dispersed. When I went for the third class, I didn't see the americans still. I wonder if their absence has got to do with the chanting of prayers on either side of the session. The instructor, in the first class, even went to the extent of trying to explain the significance of the prayers (praising the teachers who are none but the Holy Trinity themselves; surrendering ourselves to the teachers so we are prepared to receive the knowledge etc. etc.) and also promised to send the exact meanings of all the prayers being chanted, via e-mail.
I read recently in the media that Malaysian leaders banned Yoga for Muslims - as the instruction contained Hindu hymns. After several weeks of imposing the ban and negotiations or protests (?) apparently they relented to let the yoga instruction continue, without the singing of the hymns. I wonder if my missing classmates find them offensive or not to their liking as well. Not sure what the reason is. I thought of discussing this aspect with the instructor, but decided against it - as all the attendees now are Indians and I barely arrive in the class on time - and have to leave immediately after the session ends - so as to make sure Usha is not left with the kids alone for too long.
Has any one observed similar incidents that turned the otherwise interested foreigners off? Do you think yoga and prayers should not be mixed; and yoga should be seen purely as a form of exercise? As for me - I am fine and even glad to have the prayers; but don't mind accommodating the non-prayer version if that would mean the foreigners would join as well. After all, I can still say my prayers silently.
May be I am judging the missing candidates unnecessarily - and may be they are not attending for some other reason. I don't know. Although I am not being able to practise what's covered in class on other days at home as much as the instructor wants us to - I would atleast like to go for all the 8 weeks to get into the habit slowly.
I will udpate you later - but would like to hear from you in the meanwhile.
Swasti !!
Tuesday, December 02, 2008
Hope and Reality
I hope Chiru:
1) brings in the much needed change in the AP politics
2) does not resort to cheap tactics of mud slinging at the opponents
3) comes with a clear and succinct agenda
4) proposes good ideas for development and welfare
5) backs them up with good plans of action
6) builds a grass roots level movement to combat the primary evils in our society - corruption, extremism and economic imbalance (poverty)
7) brings in fresh blood into the polity rather than harboring the so called 'leaders' with corrupt and criminal background
8) joins hands with the idealistic parties like Lok Satta and work for improving the politics
9) studies the issues plaguing our society and talks about them and his ideas from his heart
10) breathes and becomes the change we want to see for a Better AP
So far, the reality has been anything but reflecting my hope. Agreed, he is a novice and needs the support of the veterans who can steer him against the dirty dozens in the opposing camps. Our society needs a fresh start - fresh minds, fresh thinking - from the roots. Not from the top.
As Einstein once famously said: No problem can be solved from the same level of consciousness that created it.
If Chiru is trying to bring about the change by surrounding himself with the same people who were part of the problem in the first place, he is already dousing my hopes.
However, Hope is Eternal and I continue to hope for better - until proven otherwise completely.
Swasti !!
Monday, December 01, 2008
Obama all the way
Today's appointment of Hillary, his Primary opponent, as Secretary of State is a master stroke - I must say - in many respects.
1) She cannot grow into an alternative power center in the Democratic Party
2) She cannot voice her dissent any more on anything of importance, done by the administration - being a part of it.
3) If she performs great - most, if not all, of the credit goes to O - for hiring her as the Secy. of State.
4) If she doesn't perform well - he can ease her out and can't be blamed for trusting such a strong lady with the plum post. The fault is all hers.
5) What more - she doesn't stand a chance of challenging him, if she wants to, for the 2012 election - whatever his administration's performance is. 2016 and beyond will effectively be beyond her anyway.
6) This particular position was occupied by at least two other ladies in the recent past - Madeline Albright and Condy Rice - so nothing special for Hillary.
7) She can't even pay off her campaign debt, as she can't raise any more funds being a part of the administration - and not seeking re-election. It has to wait longer.
If Obama and his inner circle of advisers are so shrewd and smart - I hope they are as smart in governing. Let's hope for the best - and look forward to Jan 20th. I also wish Hillary all the best for bringing about the change in the world's perception of USA; and effectively managing the 'challenging' states.
Swasti !!